Thoughts on Concealed Carry

I have a deep-seated respect for cops. My father was a Probation and Parole Officer for 20 years, and currently is a sherrif's deputy. It's safe to say that I understand more about cops than most non-officers. Yes, some can be petty and power hungry, but most I've met are just guys wanting to help their community. The image of the ball-busting asshole highway patrolman just isn't how I see officers. -and yes, I've run into a few of them, but most of my dealings with law enforcers have proven that they are generally soft spoken and curtieous.

Why is it that I now feel on edge when dealing with police officers?

I was at the local playground a few days ago with my son. We were the only ones there, and from certain views into the park, it's probable that a pedestrian couldn't see my son. To them, it would look like a lone guy standing alone in a playground. Creepy-guy.

After a half hour or so, a bicycle cop pulled up under the pavilion, and I waved and said hello. He smiled and responed with a 'hello', and stepped off of his bike. He was approximately 40 feet away from me, and he keyed his radio, saying something to the effect of 'guy playing with his kid'. He drank a sip of his water, climbed on his bike, and pedaled away.

Now, don't get me wrong. I have a son, and I'd rather get questioned a dozen times than NOT have someone call in some random guy hanging out in the playground. Better safe than sorry. But I also noticed something about myself.

When dealing with cops, now that I carry every day, I tend to get a small adrenaline spike. I don't expect them to hassle me, or give me a hard time, but I know that I have something in my pocket that isn't normal for most citizens. I know that if an officer decides that I need to be questioned, I have a responsibility to that officer to let him know that I'm armed. It may not be required by law, but I feel that officers deal with enough shit on a daily basis. They deserve, when dealing with an honest citizen to know all the angles. It keeps him safe, it keeps me safe, and it avoids misunderstanding. But what if he gets froggy? What if he wants to place me in cuffs, and I have my son nearby? Honestly, if by myself, I'd have no problems with the officer detaining me in cuffs. I know I won't do anything to warrant an arrest, and anything that diffuses a situation an makes the officer feel safer until the situation gets sorted out, I'm all for.

But I carry a gun, and I am often with my son, and I want him to be safe. So my adrenaline spikes, in response to my wondering: what type of officer will I get? A cool, collected officer that just wants to solve a situation, or a hothead, who gets froggy when something out of the norm gets thrown his way, and who doesn't take the time to hear all the facts before reacting.

And so, even though I try to shake the hands of officers and thank them whenever I see them in a restaurant or gas station, and even though I grew up with an officer for a parent, I find myself on edge when dealing with them now.

Is this a normal side-effect of carrying?